Watching the play from backstage

The ability to read minds is nowhere near as cool as it sounds.

Growing up I was an intelligent kid but as surly as all get up. I had my reasons. Imagine living every day of your life with a mild headache. Sounds do-able I know, but I'm talking ceaseless day and night fuzzy pain for 13 relentless years.

I was 13 years old when I first realised that I was the only one who was hearing the hum of other people's thoughts. 13 years to figure out what that hum was and that it was unusual.

Everything changed there and then. It was as if I'd been listening to white noise for all of my life, like there was a radio on in the background somewhere, and then suddenly a 'transmission' came through.

I don't know whether I accidently 'tuned in' or whether it was due to the strength of the thoughts, but one particularly nasty playground fight later and the floodgates were open.

Now every conversation is like a movie whose plot has been ruined for me. It's like I'm watching a film that I've never seen before but nonetheless I am, for some reason, watching it with director's commentary turned on - getting all the background trivia at the expense of the content.

Sorry about all the movie analogies but I really don't tend to do much else with my spare time than go to the cinema. Peace and quiet for me is watching a generic action movie - high octane, low plot density. Something to make everyone around me shift their minds into neutral.

I'm not really able to talk to many people about what I can do because it tends to make them start thinking about what they are thinking about, which can be absolutely deafening, not to mention tedious. Plus, people who know generally don't like to hang around me too much. Can't really blame them.

The few people who know and stick around nonetheless sometimes ask why I don't become a detective or something, and use my powers for the greater good. I figure, why should I?

Do you have any idea how depressing it is listening to the thoughts of so-called normal people? I really don't want to spend my life in the company of criminals, psychos and the all the poor bastards who spend their working life staring into that particular abyss.

So instead I teach little kids. Their minds may be loud and annoying and juvenile but the beauty of these guys is how closely what they say resembles what they think.

Because that's the thing I can't stand. Imagine if you immediately knew without a doubt every time someone lied to you. Do you even realise how often people lie? 'It's so nice to see you', 'Sorry mate, no change today', 'There's absolutely nothing to worry about', 'I love you'. Day after day after day.

What I wouldn't give for a little blissful ignorance.

By Mark Clarke

(Read all Mark's stories at ClarkeMyWords.blogspot.com.)